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    Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:28 pm

    Expensive hair gels are acon. Marmalade or Jam is a much cheaper alternative, but beware of bees in the summer. sunny






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Tue Oct 05, 2010 8:53 am

    Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender with the simple inscription "Same to you". Rolling Eyes






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    fkkScoop

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by fkkScoop on Wed Oct 06, 2010 3:35 pm

    CKJ505 wrote:Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender with the simple inscription "Same to you". Rolling Eyes

    Laughing

    I really did this...a few years ago...as a joke!


    And the best thing is, the one who received the card didn´t recognized that it was the same that he send me the year before! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Wed Oct 06, 2010 4:12 pm

    fkkScoop wrote:
    CKJ505 wrote:Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender with the simple inscription "Same to you". Rolling Eyes

    Laughing

    I really did this...a few years ago...as a joke!


    And the best thing is, the one who received the card didn´t recognized that it was the same that he send me the year before! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

    It was me, I did not want to hurt your feelings...I'll send it back to you this Christmas... Laughing






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Sat Oct 09, 2010 1:23 pm

    Taxi drivers. Why not pop into the garage andask them to fix your indicators lights for you so that other motorists knowwhere the heck you're going! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Sun Oct 10, 2010 9:42 am

    Old telephone directoriesmake ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address ofpeople you don't know. Sleep






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Mon Oct 11, 2010 8:24 am

    Boil an egg to perfection without costly egg timers by popping it into boiling water and driving away from your home at exactly 80kph. After 4 kilometers , phone the ball and chain to take the egg out the pan. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    Mace2theO

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by Mace2theO on Mon Oct 11, 2010 3:16 pm

    People from bad areas will steal your phone.
    People from good areas will steal your pension




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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Mon Oct 11, 2010 3:19 pm

    Mace2theO wrote:People from bad areas will steal your phone.
    People from good areas will steal your pension
    Sweet! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    maxim9691

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by maxim9691 on Mon Oct 11, 2010 4:55 pm

    Mace2theO wrote:People from bad areas will steal your phone.
    People from good areas will steal your pension


    People from my area will steal your pension while using your phone Laughing



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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Mon Oct 11, 2010 5:37 pm

    maxim9691 wrote:
    Mace2theO wrote:People from bad areas will steal your phone.
    People from good areas will steal your pension

    People from my area will steal your pension while using your phone Laughing

    In my area they are called the Government, ask the Frost! affraid






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    Mace2theO

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by Mace2theO on Mon Oct 11, 2010 7:20 pm

    maxim9691 wrote:
    Mace2theO wrote:People from bad areas will steal your phone.
    People from good areas will steal your pension

    People from my area will steal your pension while using your phone Laughing


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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Tue Oct 12, 2010 2:51 pm

    Take your dustbin to thesupermarket with you so that you can see which items you have recently run outof. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Thu Oct 14, 2010 8:02 pm

    Avoid being wheel-clamped by jacking your car up, removing the wheels and locking them safely in the boot until you return. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    Ymaginatif

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by Ymaginatif on Fri Oct 15, 2010 6:12 am

    CKJ505 wrote:Avoid being wheel-clamped by jacking your car up, removing the wheels and locking them safely in the boot until you return. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

    I've actually seen somebody doing that!
    Student went away for summer and left his/her car in Aber. Took the wheels off and left it standing on jacks for 3 months.
    It's a sign of law-abiding crimelessness in Aber that nobody went over and gave that car a little push [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]



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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Fri Oct 15, 2010 8:18 am

    Worried that your teeth will be stained after a heavy night drinking red wine? Drink a bottle of white wine before going to bed, to remove the stains. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Mon Oct 18, 2010 12:30 pm

    Sky TV viewers: Avoid repetitive strain injury by gluing your finger to the "prog+" button on your remote control and keeping it pressed. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:04 am

    People whose surname is Toblerone should always take along an empty 'Toblerone' chocolate box when attending interviews for office jobs. This would save your potential employer the expense of having to make a name plaque for your desk, and therefore increase your chances of getting the job. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    maxim9691

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by maxim9691 on Tue Oct 19, 2010 10:17 am

    He who lives in a glass house shouldn't throw stones

    I recommend that you move to a cave and throw glass


    And also consider how much better your heating/cooling bills will be ?!? Laughing



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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:30 am

    Avoid cutting yourself while clumsily slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. affraid






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:48 pm

    Olympic athletes. Disguise the fact that you've taken anabolic steroids by running a bit slower. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Thu Oct 21, 2010 6:05 am

    Bearded men can obtain the appearance of the upper class Arctic explorers by simply applying Tippex to their beards, painting their noses blue, and cutting off a couple of toes. It never fails to impress. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

    [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Apologies if I offended any bearded members, members that had beards in the past or members who are thinking of growing beards or even future bearded members who may read this.

    Basically anyone who had, has, or will have facial hair, I do apologise, by the way I shave everyday just in case you thought I offended myself.






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    maxim9691

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by maxim9691 on Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:36 am

    CKJ505 wrote:Bearded men can obtain the appearance of the upper class Arctic explorers by simply applying Tippex to their beards, painting their noses blue, and cutting off a couple of toes. It never fails to impress. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

    [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Apologies if I offended any bearded members, members that had beards in the past or members who are thinking of growing beards or even future bearded members who may read this.

    Basically anyone who had, has, or will have facial hair, I do apologise, by the way I shave everyday just in case you thought I offended myself.

    rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl drunk2



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    Jfrost

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by Jfrost on Thu Oct 21, 2010 1:47 pm

    I think I'm anti raser on this one ...I hate shaving and only shave Once a fortnight or so....I get the Arctic look my slurping Pints of Guinness!!!
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    CKJ505

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    Re: Tip of the Day ~ Everyday!

    Post by CKJ505 on Thu Oct 21, 2010 2:33 pm

    Jfrost wrote:I think I'm anti raser on this one ...I hate shaving and only shave Once a fortnight or so....I get the Arctic look my slurping Pints of Guinness!!!

    I'm not 100% sure but didn't Guinness use Tom Crean ' Arctic Explorer' in an advertisement campaign? That's where they got their inspiration! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]






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